A dark humanoid figure started stepping out of the lake. It was pregnant, and collapsed from tears.

The last time I felt this nice was when I was a butterfly in Paris.

The tour guide supplied us with the native sweets of the area, the taste beyond our wildest dreams. The screams of anguish from me and my group struck the tour guide and the surrounding locals.

For years there has been a zero calorie policy at this restaurant.

“Class, this is Ms. Wilburn on the phone. Please tell me what kind of rain dries as it gets wetter, as my documents require it.”

On their fishing trip, uncle Edmund and father Reese noticed that there was no logic in sight.

At the couples orgy, gathered were mostly swingers.

My acupuncturist and my chiropractor fell on each other during the morning bus ride. The acupuncturist got his neck snapped, and the chiropractor was stabbed in the ear.

The birds were allowed back in the cage, even though the keepers disagreed.

The ancient Sumerians walked with hands and fought with legs.

You deserve this promotion only because you are bathing in the darnest places.

There was this debate on whether you can lock a planet in a room, but it went too far. No one from the gentlemen’s club is alive anymore.

The vintage store near our church keeps reselling to older and older people.

The witch had captured the Bronson family and had them in a rut. But she didn’t know any tricks or spells, nor did she have any potion recipes. And she had forgotten to calculate the angular momentum of the relevant celestial objects. It was she who was in a rut.

Wolves surrounded me that starry night of winter. They took off my shoes and feasted on them, but left my knees, feet, and toes intact for a later popsicle enjoyment. They are not stupid animals.

In a kingdom far away, there was once a princess who once went to the bathroom.

As he lay there dying, John decided he should start living.

“Aaaaargh! Aaaargh! Aaaaaargh!” screamed ingredients of the salad being grazed by an unnamed action movie star.

“Hey bro, didn’t you know that smoking kills?” said Vicky to her brother, “You gotta to be of age to do it, because if not then your body won’t process the nutrients in it quick enough.”

There are two types of people in a mental hospital. Doctors that run the place, and patients that inhabit it. If the patients started running the place, it would be like Lord of the Flies, I think.

The regional conference concluded that if you are not a person of action, you will not get anything at all for Christmas.

There was once a man, and there were also others.

“Ouch! Stranger, you have stepped on my penis!”

In a far away world very different from ours lives a really funky cat.

“A bookshelf is the spider’s aphrodisiac,” said someone, then died.

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